Destiel, Bitch!
by Starr-Sensei
Summary: Expanding on S4Ep18, where Sam and Dean discover fanfiction of themselves. Destiel/Sabriel
1. Chapter 1

"Sammy, what the hell?" Dean asked, stumbling into the main room.

"It's almost two in the morning. Surely research can wait a few more hours." he griped, moving to the kitchen to search the fridge. _Yeah, it's research alright_, Sam thought, smirking to himself. Going to back to the screen in front of him, he ignored Dean, plunging right back into the story he had been reading moments before.

_Dean paused, staring into those baby blue eyes, validating his feelings as he steeled himself for the words he'd wanted to say since Perdition. "I love you, Castiel," he whispered, closing the gap between them by grabbing the Angel's favourite coat and pulling him flush against his body. "I love you, Castiel of Thursday, Angel of the Lord. I always have, and I always will." he said, eyes filled with love and assurance, before claiming those perfect lips as his own._

"What the fuck, Sammy?" Dean exclaimed. Sam jumped out of his chair, he had been so absorbed in the story he had failed to notice Dean standing over his shoulder, reading all about himself and his Angel.

"What the hell was that, Samantha?" Dean asked, voice low. Sam gulped, Dean never sounded like that unless he was serious or seriously pissed off.

"It's just some of that fanfiction, you know, that Becky and her friends write?" he explained, stammering and looking everywhere but at his brother.

"And why exactly, were you reading it?" Dean grilled, although visibly not as fierce and rigid as before. "And about me and Cas, of all people!"

"I was curious, trying to figure out if any new information from Chuck that we might have missed or wasn't in the books was in some of Becky's writings. The stories are fiction, but they're all based mostly on truth." he took a breath. "I didn't know it would turn into a chick flick!" he exclaimed. _At least, not at first_, he amended internally.

Dean studied his brother, before sighing. "Alright, show me this crap." Sam glanced up quickly, meeting his brother's eyes. Dean shrugged. "If you think there might be information hiding in there, it's worth a shot. You're the nerd. This is nerd stuff. I'll follow your lead on this one. Besides, I've yet to find us a reliable case that isn't already being worked on." Sam smiled at that, knowing that was as close to a compliment that he would get from Dean.

"Well, I really don't think you'll like it, though."

Dean huffed, "Yeah, I kind of already figured that out. Too many chick flick moments." he fake shuddered.

"It's not the chick flick moments that make it bad. It's the ships."

Dean looked confused. "The what?" he asked.

"Ships. They're called that because the fans take a pairing they like, a pairing of characters, and they "ship" it. Meaning they like the characters being together and want it to be canon. Canon being the real story. When it doesn't happen in canon, it's called ship sinking." Sam explained, going into what Dean lovingly called "SuperNerdMode".

Dean looked thoughtful for a second, committing the information to memory for future reference. He sat down, looking even more tired than before. "Okay. So what are the ships for the Supernatural books?" he asked, opening his own laptop.

"Well, technically, a ship can be made of any two, or sometimes more, characters throughout an entire work or series. But the main ones for Supernatural are; Destiel, Sabriel, Crowstiel, Crobby, and Samifer." Sam studied Dean, watching for a reaction that might end up with a fist sized mark on his face.

"What are those, like Bradgelina kind of stuff?" Dean asked, face scrunched.

"Yeah, mostly. Just a combination of names. There's you and Cas, me and Gabriel, Crowley and Cas, Crowley and Bobby, and me and Lucifer." Sam rattled off, surprised that Dean was taking it so well. _Maybe he was intrigued when he read about himself and Castiel. Yeah, that's definitely it,_ he thought.

"Oh man, Sammy, I can't wait to tell Bobby about 'Crobby'." he guffawed, sipping his beer. "You know, we could get Crowley to leak Becky that picture of their deal, too." he winked conspiratorially.

Sam smiled wide, shaking his head. "Only you, Dean, would be that cruel."

Dean just smiled, and started looking for his own story to read. Glancing up, he saw Sam flinching, looking down fast as if to not be detected. He knew his baby brother, and he knew that he was nervous, watching Dean for an adverse reaction to something he found online. And that could only mean that he hadn't told his big brother something, and judging by the unusually uncomfortable silence, it was something big.

"Alright, Sammy, give it up. Any other ships I should prepare myself for? Because obviously you're not telling me something." he kept his voice light, but his eyes were piercing.

Gulping, Sam looked at his brother, drawing a breath. Licking his lips, he averted his gaze and said, "Well, Dean, there's, uh, well, there's also Wincest." his voice barely above a whisper.

Dean's eyes grew wide. "You mean..." he trailed off, disbelieving.

"Yes, Dean. Wincest. You and I. Together."


	2. Chapter 2

Dean swallowed hard, mind drawing a complete blank. He opened and closed his mouth, not knowing what he could possibly say. It was Sam that broke first, clearing his throat awkwardly.

"Right, well, uh, just a warning. You can take over the second site on the search page, I guess. We'e looking for anything that might give us a lead on, well, anything. Since we know the story so well, it should be easy to separate fact from fiction. Just remember to avoid stories where it says 'AU', meaning Alternate Universe', because that's way off track." Sam rambled, trying to make it easier on his brother.

Dean simply nodded, eyes distant."I need a drink." he sighed, standing up and walking towards the grunting, indicating Dean pour two. He complied, carrying that glasses to the table.

"So, Sammy?" he began, settling in front of his laptop once again.

"Yeah, Dean?" Sam asked, tilting his head.

"Are you really into me?" he smirked.

Sam floundered, nearly dropping his drink, spluttering.

"What? No! Dean... what?" he stuttered, bewildered.

Dean simply grinned at him, catlike, and leaned forward.

"Don't lie to me, Samantha."

* * *

><p>{AN : I don't normally do Author's Notes, but I would like to make this a fan oriented story. I write many stories where I don't let the readers alter my decisions on anything, but I wanted to try different in this instance. I'm going to put a poll on my page and I would appreciate it if you would take time to vote on the pairings. Obviously, the title is Destiel, but that doesn't mean it has to be. The pairings will be:

Dean/Cas with Sam/Gabriel

Dean/Sam with Crowley/Castiel

Dean/Sam with Castiel/Gabriel

Those are pairings I am used to writing. I leave it up to you, though. Go forth and vote.}


	3. Chapter 3

Sam simply rolled his eyes, huffing at his brother's stupidity.

"Whatever, Dean. Besides, Cas would have my head." he smirked at his brother's blush, internally shaking his head at him. '_I wish they would get their heads out of their asses already. Life would be so much simpler. Not to mention, I would tell Becky if he ever stepped out of line_.' he thought.

"What the hell are you smiling at?" Dean asked, indignant.

"Nothing." Sam quipped, settling back in his chair. "Now, can we get started?"

"Yeah, yeah, keep your hair on. But I'm not reading anything. You can read it to me, and I'll write down anything I don't remember as 'canon'," he air-quoted. "Besides, you owe me for waking me up.

Sam simply sent him Bitchface #14 and pulled up a new story.

"'A Match Made in Hell' is the title.

'_Crowley smiled over his handiwork, stepping back to take it all in, as he would art. The lesser demon had attempted to convert to Abbadon's side, and he simply could not have that_.'"

"Abbadon?" Dean asked, brow furrowed. Sam just shrugged, "Write it down."

Clearing his throat, he began again,

"'_"Castiel?" he called. "Come here, kitten." _

_"What is it you require of me, Crowley?" the angel asked, surveying the bloody scene in front of him. _

_"Do you think you can get any more out of him? I know how good you can be with your hands." Crowley was flirting, the angel knew that much. What he didn't know, was why.  
>"No, I do not think that I can," he replied, walking around the demon's near lifeless form. <em>

_"You certainly did an excellent job on him." he praised, nodding his head appreciatively. Crowley beamed at his praise, and stepped closer to his partner, putting a hand on his trench coat. _

_"Well then, lets go somewhere more appropriate for business." he smirked, his tone implying that business was very, very far from his mind. Not giving the angel time enough to respond, he unfurled his own wings, instantly transporting them to his office. Castiel seemed surprised, and his eyes searched the face of the Demon King. _

_"I didn't know demons could even have wings. Or is it spell craft?" he asked quietly, as if he would a wounded animal. _

_"No, they are very real. They are the reason most demons fear me. When my soul was brought to Hell, a pair of attached wings came with it, as I manifested my corporeal state." Ever since they had begun working together, he found himself explaining himself frequently, actively seeking out Castiel's approval, something he never did with anyone, not even when he was human. He was snapped out of his reverie by a voice. _

_"Can I see them?"_'"

"Why'd you stop?" Dean asked angrily. '_I actually want to know what happens!_' he thought, surprised at himself.

"That's the end of the chapter." Sam said, looking at Dean quizzically.

"Well, we learned a few things we will definitely have to check out; Abbadon, Crowley's wings, and Crowley and Cas working together." Dean read off his list, setting down his pen. Sam, nodding, starting to speak, only to be interrupted by Dean's growling stomach.

"I guess I'll go grab some grub from the diner down the street. They should be open by now." Dean, reasoned, standing up and grabbing his keys. "We can read the rest when I get back!" he smiled. Sam shook his head and nodded.

"Good. This may actually wind up giving us a few good leads, if not a fresh pair of eyes on our situation."


	4. Chapter 4

There are many things that run through Dean's mind every day, and here lately Castiel was making more and more of an appearance. He ran his hand through his short hair, glad Sam hadn't decided to join him. He had known for years that he wasn't entirely straight, and if he had been on the fence at any time in his life, the brother's last landlord had pushed him over.

'_Anything for rent_.' Dean laughed bitterly, remembering his high school years alone raising Sam. He shifted his thoughts back to the Angel. His Angel. Or so he liked to think. Dean knew this much, whatever he felt for the Angel, it wasn't just for his Vessel's remembered the way he felt when Castiel's Grace touched his soul, and the way he feels like he knows the Angel in a way that he can never fathom. Sighing, he pulled the Impala back into the hotel parking lot.

He was fucked, either way.

Sam nearly fell over as he read the next story on the list.

"'A Sabriel Story: Filling Me With Grace'" the colour drained from his face. Thinking about Gabriel always made his chest ache, and he had yet to figure out why. He heard Dean approaching the door and he moved to open the door for him.

"Sam, your chick food is getting way too expensive! Ten bucks for a bowl of lettuce?" Dean asked, exasperated.

"Yes, Dean, ten bucks for a bowl of lettuce. Very good and healthy lettuce. Difference. Did you get it, or not?" Sam sent him BitchFace number Thirty-Two, as he rifled through the bags.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep your pants on." he smiled, sitting down at the table.

"Was there another chapter?" he asked, not really wanting to hear the answer. He didn't like the sound of Crowley and Cas together. Ever. Under any circumstances. Opening his salad, Sam sat back down at the computer.

"That was the last chapter, but I set it up to alert me if there is anything new posted on it." he replied.

"Good," Dean said, already stuffing a burger into his mouth.

"Dude, gross." Sam crinkled his brow.

"Whatever, bitch. What's the next story?" Sam winced,

"Sabriel, apparently. And because it's about me, _you _can read it." Sam smiled, smug.

"Suits me just fine. I can make fun of you and the ArchDick all at the same time." he laughed, turning the laptop towards himself, missing Sam gave whenever Dean mentioned the Angel's name. Sam picked up the pen from the table, and motioned Dean to continue.

"_'A Sabriel Story: Filling Me With Grace'_" he quirked a brow at his brother, but kept on.

"_'-'Sam walked on, passing his brother before breaking into a run. "Gabriel!" he screamed, sprinting towards the archangels lifeless body. "Gabriel!"'- Sam woke up, sweating and gasping for breath. He laid back onto the bed, body shaking with silent tears. If he wasn't sure of his feelings before, he was now. _

_'Now that's it's too late', he sobbed. He buried himself into the pillows, wishing with every fiber of his being that Gabriel was still alive, hoping that, if he was, he could finally tell him exactly how he felt. Turning over, he wiped away his tears.'" _

Dean glanced at Sam before continuing, noticing the way he was pale and breathing shallow_. "'Gabriel looked on, watching his favourite Winchester toss and turn and cry. He reached out and brushed the hair back from his forehead, filling Sam with just an ounce of his Grace, enough to settle his emotions and leave him with happy dreams. Making sure he was peaceful, and breathing deeply, he moved himself away from the bed to sit in the corner chair of the room. _

_He didn't quite know how it happened, but he did know this much; he was in love with Sam Winchester.'_"

Sam stopped his brother, bolting out of his chair and running towards the bathroom. He couldn't get the intense feeling out of his mind, when he thought about Gabriel. It felt like someone had literally ripped a hole through his heart.

Dean, oblivious to the emotional reasons behind Sam's outburst, yelled, "I told you that rabbit food would kill you one day!" Sam bit back a sob, glad that Dean respected him enough not to come in. He dried his sudden tears and stood over the sink. He regretted so much about his past relationship with Gabriel, and regretted his absence even more. Throwing water on his face, he pressed up against the door.

'_I'm losing it_,' he thought miserably. '_What makes Dean and Cas so special, that Cas keeps coming back for him? Why can't Gabriel?_' he shook his head and took a deep breath before opening the a smile, he replied, "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Keep, uh, keep going. I'll just lay down, in case of another round of vengeful lettuce." he laughed weakly.

"I think that's the only chapter. I can subscribe to it though, since it did give us a big lead to track down." Dean replied, finishing his burger and standing up. "Focus on not throwing up, and I'll throw this crap out. We'll find something else to read. They aren't half bad, so far. "

'_If you only knew_,' Sam finished.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam once again fell asleep tormented by the images of Gabriel's death, only to wake up feeling refreshed, with no memory of the dreams left. He mused that Cas had been helping him out, that maybe Dean had told him about his tossing and turning. Either way, he was grateful for the release. Stretching out of bed, he glanced down, noticing something gold glinting in the morning light underneath the chair. He picked it up, a single golden feather. Stowing it in his bag, he resolved to ask Cas about it later.

* * *

><p>Dean sat on the counter in the bathroom, hiding away from the rest of the world. It was childish, he knew, but he needed to think.<p>

'_Except_', he thought sarcastically, '_It's the thinking that's driving me crazy._'

Nonstop thoughts of Castiel flitted through his mind, confusing him more than ever. Cas was his best friend, and not only that, an Angel of the Lord. He only kissed Meg because he had seen it done, and had sex with April because of what he learned from the Pizza Man.

'Now that he's recovered, will he even have those urges? Why do I have those urges?'

Hopping off the counter, he turned and looked at himself in the mirror. 'Feelings are stupid.'

Hearing Sam rouse from his bed, he sighed. Contemplation time was over.

"Dean?" Sam called. He opened the door, cracking a smile.

"Sorry, Sammy. Duty calls." Sam simply rolled his eyes and pushed past him, shutting the door quietly.

Plopping down on his bed, Dean mused, "I wonder where Cas is."

"I'm right here, Dean." Cas interrupted, sitting next to him on the bed. Dean jumped slightly, never quite used to the Angel's zapping everywhere.

"Cas, you've really got to start giving me a warning, okay?"

"I'm sorry, Dean. I felt your discomfort and decided to come quickly." Dean smiled, and relaxed.

"Thanks, Cas. How did you know?"

"Our bond, Dean. I can always feel your emotions."

Dean's face paled, "Al-Always?" he stammered.

"Yes, Dean. Let me show you. Close your eyes."

Dean looked at him for a moment, but complied. Castiel smiled, and shut his eyes in concentration, reaching into his mind. He walked along its corridors, coming to the drawbridge that was the barrier to Dean's mind. He wished Dean would allow him access to all of him, to fully open the drawbridge, but he knew deep down that that would never even be a possibility. He reached up and knocked on the heavy wooden door, hard and loud. He only stopped when he heard Dean gasp, and opened his eyes.

"Castiel...what was that?" Dean asked, voice low, eyes searching his own.

"That was our Bond, Dean." he smiled.

* * *

><p>Sam listened close, ear to the door, and he felt like there was no one as unlucky as him. There they were on the other side of the cheap wood, making peace and chatting about their '<em>Bond<em>', while he was left alone. He knew he was acting like a child, but it did hurt. It took him too late to realize that he had an Angel of his own. '_Gabriel,_' he prayed, '_Please come back to me._'


	6. Chapter 6

Dean's mind whirred, constantly tripping over the small fact that the 'Bond' Cas was always referring to was real, was _touchable_.

"That...that was our Bond?" he asked, staring into the blue depths of the Angel's eyes.

"Yes, Dean," Cas smiled, "That is our connection, and it allows us to communicate to each other our feelings, even our thoughts."

Dean looked down, face furrowed in thought. Cas reached into his mind once again and simply pressed his ethereal form against the drawbridge, letting himself tough Dean's mind fully, only separated by a thin membrane, one that could only be removed with a Mating Ritual or permission. He could feel Dean's reaction, a slight tense-and relax motion of a wave.

"If you look within your mind Dean, you might be able to see it, now that you know it exists." he said, bringing Dean out of his thoughts.

"What should I look for?" he asked.

"Mine is a drawbridge in shape, because I cannot fully access your mind until you give me permission. Yours, however, should look more like a door or a gate."

Dean nodded, and leaned back against the headboard, closing his eyes.

* * *

><p>Sam decided that he had done enough moping about for the day, and straightened up.<p>

_'I can't believe I've been reduced to snooping on my brother through a bathroom door_.' he snorted. Gathering himself, he opened the door. Smiling, he took in the sight of a fresh and clean Cas sitting on the edge of his brother's bed.

"Hey, Cas!" he said, walking over to him.

"Hello, Sam," Cas smiled.

"It's been quite some time since we last saw you! How is everything upstairs?" he asked, quite concerned for the Angel's well-being.

"Yes, everything is progressing quite nicely." Sam nodded, and bent down to pick up his bag.

Setting it on the table, he asked, "What is Dean doing?"

Glancing at the now lifeless form of Dean Winchester, Castiel smiled.

"Sleeping, apparently." he replied.

Sam shook his head and laughed. "Typical."

He put his phone inside his bag, noticing the glint of something gold. Pulling out the feather from the night before, he turned back to the Angel.

"Cas, did you lose this one night? I know how you like to check on Dean some nights."

Cas looked puzzled. "I haven't been here to check on either of you." he tilted his head and took the feather from Sam to examine it. His eyes widened as he felt the remaining remnants of an Angel's Grace.

He instantly knew who had been here, and he also knew that that particular Angel was dead. He met Sam's eyes before fluttering his own wings.

"Cas, wait, what?" Sam began, but it was useless.

Cas was gone.


End file.
